Life....My Thoughts.....

Life is full of wonder and expectations. Expectations form oneself and from others. We have grown into thinking that women have to be stick skinny and men have to be "buff". The truth is that we can be anyway we want to be, but unfortunately that doesn’t mean tat we will always be accepted by some. We must make mistake in order to learn new things and grow. We learn what is right and what is wrong. Don't get me wrong, no one is perfect except for God up there. There is a reason that He made us imperfect, I believe it was so that we could learn what our calling in life is. As I stated we must learn to grow. And our lives on Earth are what prepare us for the Eternal Life in Heaven. I am proud to say that I have found God and that I am still searching for what I am supposed to do in my life. I know I will find it someday, I don't know when I will find that out though. For now I know that I want to go to college and major in something that I will enjoy and that will help me to help other people, especially children. I think that people underestimate the knowledge that a child has, and how much of a delight they are. Children are our future, and how we respond to them is what will determine what they will go on to be or do. Being a teenager and juggling High School, College, working and homework is not easy but if you have a great attitude you will enjoy the ride. I have found that picking a major for myself is not easy. I have been through so many things and I still don't know what I want to be. There are so many things to chose from and that is the hard part. Being a person that doesn't really talk to anyone has been one of my challenges. Although it has taken me time to overcome them I have little by little become more sociable. I love meeting new people but sometimes I don't know what to talk about when I am around them. I used to think that whatever I said would sound stupid to other people. I thought people would look down upon me and think that I was untalented and worthless. I had a low self esteem back then and now I have learned that I was the only one that looked down upon myself, I thought I wasn't capable of doing anything but be felt sorry for by everyone including me. Now I have joined Drama and have made friends with the people there, even though I had already known them for most of my life. I hope to make more friends in my journey in life. I hope to make a change in the world and be happy with what I have and what I am capable of doing for others and myself.

Advocating

Yesterday was Film Day in Santa Fe New Mexico. Why? Well because there is a bill that may or may not be passed to take away the film industries from here. That is what we don’t want to happen, and that is why we went. If anyone from the Roundhouse reads this please read all of this. Drama and Film classes have given us an opportunity to show everyone everywhere that we can act and direct movies and plays. We are from the small town that has never been acknowledged for our triumphs. I really hope that you understand that Miss. Janet Davidson has come from being a director to being our Drama and Film teacher and we have never had that so please do not take that from us.

Thank you,
Catherine E. Brown-Ruiz

Michael Jackson

 

He was not just a man. He was an angel. He wanted to save the world. He wanted to heal our children. He was a man of great talent. He was a gift. He was a father. His life ended too, too soon. Why? God might have needed another angel. So he was chosen. He never failed to delight us with his wonderful voice and dance. He showed us that he cared for the sick children and his own. Although he decided to leave the cd making business in 2001, he was never forgotten when he announced that he was to perform for the last time of his life. Some cheered. Some laughed. Some couldn’t wait. Others didn’t care. Why wasn’t he help? Why didn’t ask for help? Was he scared? No one knows. Not even him. I believe that a negligent doctor knew that he was sick, knew what would happen if something went wrong, knew how this would hurt the world. He was a man that was never understood. A man that had high hopes for his future. He was unique. He was Michael Jackson.

Feelings..........

Feelings are always within us, especially teen girls. I used t always be depressed and say and crying all the time but that was before I understood why this was. I hate having to be a 17 year old girl that has so many different feelings because of hormones (Testosterone). I had learned this in my Psychology class but it had never soaked into my brain I guess until my aunt explained it to me. The problem with me is figuring out how to control them, I am doing well right now so I guess I am fine. For a girl there is a need to have to talk to someone that is other than her mother. Why? I can't answer that. All I know is that that is what has happened to me. Growing up in a small town where it is hard to make or meet true friends is well hard. It is hard because people underestimate your talents and success in them. I know I can count on someone everyday of my life. God. He is always with me and always protects us. No matter if you are a believer or not, He is there. Everyone knows He is there, some just don’t acknowledge Him because He is not physically present. The Lord has saved me and I hope that He will save all of you. Those who come and read this blog I don’t want you to see me as “narrow minded” or a “preacher”. I am just a regular girl that had always known about the Lord, always believed in him, but never found him. He is my best friend and I hope that He will become one of yours too.


Love & Rockets,
Catherine Evangelina Brown-Ruiz